Breaking news. Brett Fav-ruh has announced his retirement from the NFL.

No, no, no, no, no.  Don’t be jerks, guys.  Seriously.   He means it this time. No crying or anything.  Just a meeting with Woody Johnson and an e-mail to ESPN.  And we know that when he starts sending e-mails and text messages to ESPN, he means business.

Johnson released a statement saying, “Brett Favre is a Hall of Fame player, but he is also a Hall of Fame person.”

In addition to the fact that that is like the nicest thing ever, it also got me thinking.  If there’s such a thing as a Hall of Fame person, could I be one? I do a lot of good works. I don’t know exactly where this People’s Hall of Fame or whatever is-presumably somewhere in the Midwest-but I’m putting those on the selection committee on notice that I’m interested.

Those of you who are familiar with my feelings about Fav-ruh probably assume that I’m going to use this as yet another opportunity to rip on him.  But, actually, as long as he doesn’t accidentally un-retire again and finds a way to keep his mouth shut for the duration of spring training, we’re cool.  I mean, I still obviously think he’s a sociopathic evil mastermind on a mission of destruction.  For now, though, I’m just too happy to say anything but, “Good riddance.”

As for the Jets?  Will I forgive them for ruining my football season and come home to the Meadowlands?  Yet to be determined. Let’s see what they do with all that salary cap room.

In the meantime, I’m going to start looking into this whole People’s Hall of Fame situation.  I mean, I couldn’t say for sure, but I’m like 85% certain that I held a door for an elderly person today.  And I definitely never killed a turkey and left it in someone’s locker.