In an article inside the World Baseball Classic program-a publication as noted and respected as the one inside the front pocket of an airline seat-Derek Jeter is quoted as saying, “The last three years, all you hear from the players, everyone’s asking [each other] if they’re going to play in the Classic.”

Oh, Jeet.  That’s just not even a vaguely plausible assertion-even coming from you.  But I love that you tried.

Still, while Canada’s elimination from the games yesterday may not be the event that made the earth stood still, I’m sure it was disappointing nonetheless. I mean, who wants to be knocked out in the first round of this thing and, worse yet, to be taken out by the Italians?   I mean, it’s baseball.  Not soccer.

Well, look on the bright side, guys.  More time to slaughter baby seals, eh?

As for the rest of it, Japan and Korea will both move on to Round two.  My boys in SK are totally on fire and undefeated as of yet. (Correction: I erased 14-2 drubbing of Korea by Japan from my mind after their succesful rematch and return to the top of the pack.  My apologies for inaccurate reporting.) My boys in Puerto Rico have also secured a spot in the second round, as have the Americans.  So far, these are the only four teams who are certain to advance.  China, Taiwan, South Africa, and of course, the Canadians, are out.  Or should I say oot?

There will be three games played today for elimination.  Cuba and Australia will square off, and the winner of that duel will advance to the second round.  The loser will play Mexico for the other spot tomorrow.  Italy will also compete to advance to the next round.

But my favorite part of this drama comes in the form of the rematch between the Dominican Republic and the Dutch.  Yes, the Dutch and the Dominican Republic are tied and have to go head-to-head yet again in order to see which is truly the better team.  I mean, how did this become a rivalry?  And, better yet, what if the Dutch were to actually win?

I’m telling you, they seem like they’re all just tulips and clogs, but they’re truly a shifty people.