Trapped In The Rotunda: Chapter One
Well, we all know what happened to the Yankees last night. If you don’t, you can read about it here. I’d just as soon not talk about it. Fortunately, I was spared the indignity of having to actually watch it because I was too busy taking in the splendor of Opening Night at Citi Field.
That’s right; time for a little exclusive coverage.
The first thing that I think that it’s important to note about Citi Field is the rotunda. That’s right. The rotunda. Perhaps, you will think that this is a silly thing to note. And, yet, go to Citi Field and count how many times someone directs you to the rotunda. If your experience is like mine, you’ll quickly lose count. You’ll just hear the word and be like, “Am I seriously going to hear the word ‘rotunda’ more times in this one evening than I have ever heard it in all the years of my life leading up to now?”
In any event, our first several trips through the rotunda occurred when we went to get our tickets from will call. I asked someone where to go, he paused, looked flummoxed and said, “Through the rotunda and to your left.”
I went through the rotunda, as instructed. And, yet, my tickets weren’t there. So I asked yet another staff member where I might find the tickets. Again, a look of confusion, hesitation, and then, “Through the rotunda.”
From the parking lot to the will call, I was directed to the rotunda, through the rotunda, and around the rotunda approximately thirteen times. One person didn’t even bother to complete a full sentence in response to my inquiry. She just said, “rotunda.”
That was when I began to suspect that something deeper was going on. And suddenly a call came through to me on my brand new Iphone. (Iphone, Iphone, Iphone.)
That’s right. In the spirit of R. Kelly. You get a cliffhanger.
Brilliant/Hilarious
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