I recently received an e-mail from a friend with the subject heading, “tennis and swearing (not McEnroe by a long shot).”  It read:

Played tennis yesterday with family.  One guy on the next court shouted “Pujols!” every time he made a mistake

Coincidence, you say? I think not.  Well, possibly, but what are the odds that my soul mate lives in New Jersey? (The presumed location of the aforementioned tennis match.)  No, I’d like to think that you, my loyal readership, are taking my incomprehensibly adolescent sense of humor and bringing it into the world.

If perchance you aren’t, take a moment and visit the glossary. Bring some of its pearls into the world. As previously established, when you’re at a loss, it’s never inappropriate to say that someone’s got hands like tits.